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Tag Archives: cricket jokes

Cricket and Divorce

The Judge (J.) asks the little girl (LG):
Now that your parents are getting divorced do you want to live
with your mummy?
LG – No, my mummy beats me.
J. – Well then, I guess you want to live with your daddy.
LG – No, my daddy beats me too.
J. – Well then, who do you want to live with?
LG – I want to live with the Indian Cricket team, they never
beat anybody !!!

200 yards

The cricketer was proud of his progress as a batsman and invited his mother-in-law along to watch him play, hoping to impress her.

At the crease, he turned to the wicket-keeper and said ‘I’m anxious to do well and really hit this ball. That’s my wife’s mother over there.’

‘Don’t be silly,’ said the wicket-keeper. ‘You’ll never hit her at two hundred yards.

What Cricketers talk on the pitch

At the start of the Indian innings(280 required for a win),
Ganguly to Ramesh “I am not comfortable with Akhtar’s pace. So I
will attack Akram and u take care of Akhtar.”

After 4 overs(with hardly any runs on the board),
Ramesh to Ganguly “These guys are bowling very fast. We will see
them off and then attack Mahmood and Saqlain.”

After 13 overs(when Azhar Mahmood and Saqlain were bowling),
Ganguly to Dravid “I don’t think we can score off these guys as
well. We will wait for Arshad Khan and Shahid Afridi. Surely we can easily
attack them. After all, Shahid Afridi is a part-time bowler.”

After Afridi bowled some overs,
Dravid to Robin Singh “Don’t worry, Robin. I heard that England
bowlers are easier to score off. We will play out 50 overs and attack in the
next match.”

At the end of the match,
Joshi to Mongia “Why didn’t u try to force the pace?”

Mongia to Joshi “No, yaar. If I try to force the pace against these
bowlers, I will get out. There is only one way by which I can score runs fastly without getting out.”

Joshi to Mongia “What is it?”

Mongia to Joshi ” You have to bowl to me.”