*** WHAT IT MEANS TO HAVE A North Indian GIRL as WIFE ***
1. At the time of marriage, a north Indian girl has more boyfriends than her
2. Before marriage, she looks almost like a bollywood heroine and after marriage
you have to go around her twice to completely hug her.
3. By the time she professes her undevoted love to you, you are bankrupt because
of the number of times you had to take her out to movies, theatres and
restaurants. And you wait longingly for her dowry.
4. The only dishes she can think of to cook is paneer butter masala, aloo sabji,
aloo gobi sabji, aloo matar, aloo paneer, that after eating all those paneer and
aloos you are either in the bed with chronic cholesterol or chronic gas
5. The only growth that you see later in your career is the rise in your monthly
6. You are blinded by her love that you think that she is a blonde. Only later
do you come to know that it is because of the mehandhi that she applies to cover
her grey hair.
7. When you come home from office she is very busy watching “Kyonki saas bhi
kabi bahu thi” that you either end up eating outside or cooking yourself.
8. You are a very “Especial” person to her.
9. She always thought that Madrasis a state and covers the whole of south
Indiauntil she met you.
10. When she says she is going to “work out” she means she is going to
11. She has greater number of relatives than the number of people you have in
your home town.
*** WHAT IT MEANS TO HAVE A South Indian GIRL as WIFE ***
1. Her mother looks down at you because you didn’t study in IIT or Madras/
2. Her father starts or ends every conversation with .. I say…”
3. She shudders if you use four letter words.
4. She has long hair, neatly oiled and braided (The Dubai based Oil Well Company
will negotiate with her on a 25 year contract to extract coconut oil from her
5. She uses the word ‘Super’ as her only superlative.
6. Her name is another name for a Goddess or a flower.
7. Her first name is longer than your first name, middle name and surname
combined (unless you are from Andhra)
8. When she mixes milk/curd and rice you are never sure whether it is for the
dog or for herself.
9. For weddings, she sports a mini jasmine garden on her head and wears silk
saris in the Madrasheat without looking too uncomfortable while you are melting
in your singlet.
10. Her favorite cricketer is Krishnamachari Srikkanth.
11. Her favorite food is dosa though she has tried North Indian snacks like
Chats (pronounced like the slang for ‘conversation’)
12. She bores you by telling you which raaga each song you hear is based on.
1 3. You have to give her jewellery, though she has already got plenty of it.
14. Her Mangal Sutra weighs more than the championship belts worn by WWF
15. Her father thinks she is much smarter than you.